K-Tel Presents

Source: AceOfSpades
Published: Jan 11, 2018
Author: WeirdDave
Post Date: 2018-01-12 00:06:02 by Tooconservative
Views: 3900



Stupid Hits of the 70s! Announcing a new collection of all of the songs that you knew and loved, yet can't quite believe were hits! You'll get The Bouys!

Daddy Dewdrop!

Bo Donaldson and The Heywoods!

Paper Lace!

The Original Caste!


That's right, this album contains songs so bad, they're good! "How on earth did these songs become hits?" you'll ask yourself. We don't know, but we do know you remember Zager and Evans!

The Royal Guardsmen!

Rick Dees!

The Captain and Tennille!

And many more! All together you get 25 original hits by the original artists on two jam-packed LPs or one long playing 8-track! Act now, send your entire wallet to PO Box 5170, Grand Michids, Rapigan. 90051! ORDER TODAY!

...

The Yahoo Group knows that this may read like a parody, but K-tel actually put out loads of albums filled with bad music just like this, and even advertised them as such.


Poster Comment:

Also at AoS yesterday:

January 10, 1976, CW McCall went to No.1 on the US singles chart with 'Convoy', it made No.2 in the UK. CW McCall was in fact an advertising agent whose real name was Bill Fries. via thisdayinmusic.com

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#1: Pinguinite    To: Tooconservative (#0)

A few of these certainly had a social/cult appeal, like Billy, Don't Be A Hero, 2525, and One Tin Soldier. That can make up for any musical deficiency, though I don't think any of those three were deficient.

Pinguinite posted on 2018-01-12 00:37:05   Reply   Private Reply


#2: Tooconservative    To: Pinguinite (#1)

A few of these certainly had a social/cult appeal, like Billy, Don't Be A Hero, 2525, and One Tin Soldier.

I'd include The Night Chicago Died. There were far more schmaltzy songs back in the day. It had a story, memorable words, multiple hooks, percussion.

I had forgotten entirely that first one about cannibalism in a collapsed mine.

I tossed in Convoy just because it was so utterly phony and almost the lone example of a song by a "singer" who could not carry a tune of any kind while he grunted along in a bass voice. But it was fun and hit #1 despite that.

Tooconservative posted on 2018-01-12 00:55:14   Reply   Private Reply


#3: Hondo68    To: Tooconservative, Good God Y'awl (#0)

The Cover of the Rolling Stone was a hit in '73 - Dr. Hook and the Medicine Show

Good God y'awl! Edwin Starr '70 - War

Hondo68 posted on 2018-01-12 01:18:05   Reply   Private Reply


#4: Pinguinite    To: hondo68 (#3)

I had forgotten entirely that first one about cannibalism in a collapsed mine.

I listened to about 2/3rds of that one before moving on. I didn't recognize the song at all unlike the others. I didn't know that that is what happened to Tim.

Pinguinite posted on 2018-01-12 02:14:54   Reply   Private Reply


#5: Deckard    To: Tooconservative (#0)

Timothy - a feel-good song about some guys trapped in a mine who eat their buddy to survive.

Some of these songs came out in the late sixties - In The Year 2525 (actually a pretty cool song) and the Snoopy song. That one I was in 7th or eighth grade when it came out.

The band America did Muskrat Love - the C&T version came later.

I think One Tin Soldier was in one of the Billy Jack movies.

CW McCall (Bill Fries) was a jingle writer most notably for Old Home Bread (Old Home Filler-Up An' Keep On A-Truckin' Cafe) in Omaha when I was stationed there at Offutt AFB - in fact I took some classes at the studio where Convoy was recorded.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F9OCgem4a_k

Deckard posted on 2018-01-12 06:09:25   Reply   Private Reply


#6: Tooconservative    To: Deckard (#5)

Timothy - a feel-good song about some guys trapped in a mine who eat their buddy to survive.

Well, not exactly a feel-good song. More a lament that when they were rescued, the singer had a full belly of Timothy. It raises the question of whether there was any need to (possibly kill and) eat their co-worker.

I do like songs that tell a story.

Tooconservative posted on 2018-01-12 07:17:18   Reply   Private Reply


#7: Deckard    To: Tooconservative (#6)

Well, not exactly a feel-good song.

Overcoming insurmountable odds to survive and relying on the overwhelming will to live, the two buddies did whatever it took to make it home alive - what's not to feel good about that? Yeah - I was being somewhat sarcastic in my original post.

More a lament that when they were rescued, the singer had a full belly of Timothy.

I read somewhere that "Timothy" may have been a mule or other pack animal - but that doesn't make sense.

BTW, did you know that the song was written by Rupert Holmes who also did "Escape (The Piña Colada Song)"?

Deckard posted on 2018-01-12 07:39:11   Reply   Private Reply


#8: no gnu taxes    To: Tooconservative (#0)

I always thought it was funny how in 2525, they obviously ran out of ideas for words that rhymed with 5. No problem; they just doubled the ante and started using 10.

no gnu taxes posted on 2018-01-12 07:55:06   Reply   Private Reply


#9: no gnu taxes    To: Tooconservative (#0)

Who could forget this inspiring top 40 gem:

no gnu taxes posted on 2018-01-12 08:05:23   Reply   Private Reply


#10: Tooconservative    To: no gnu taxes (#9)

Who could forget this inspiring top 40 gem:

Me, for one.     : )

Tooconservative posted on 2018-01-12 08:43:58   Reply   Private Reply


#11: Deckard    To: no gnu taxes (#9)

Inspiring?

One-hit wonders Bloodrock improbably scored a Top 40 hit with a gruesome, eight-and-a-half minute, first-person account of dying. The hard rockers' music resembles a British ambulance siren and the lyrics describe the gory aftermath of a plane crash as a man is tended to by an EMT.

He feels "something warm flowing down [his] fingers," he tries to move his arm but when he looks he sees "there's nothing there." He looks for his girlfriend, and sees her face covered in blood as she looks off distantly. By the end, he offers this couplet: "The sheets are red and moist where I'm lying/God in Heaven, teach me how to die."

It ends with the sound of American sirens. "I guess maybe just the whole thing as a package [music and lyrics] is what freaked people out, and on top of that the sirens," keyboardist Steve Hill said in a 2010 interview. "The FCC banned 'D.O.A.' A lot of stations didn't play that because people were pulling over in their cars because they thought there was an ambulance behind them."

At least as "inspiring" as Timothy was

Deckard posted on 2018-01-12 11:22:39   Reply   Private Reply


#12: no gnu taxes    To: Deckard (#11)

I thought it might be obvious that I used the word "inspiring" in a sardonic kind of way.

no gnu taxes posted on 2018-01-12 11:54:22   Reply   Private Reply


#13: Liberator    To: Tooconservative (#0)

Loved K-Tel! Had a bunch of those 70s albums.

Daddy Dewdrops and 1971's 'Chick-a-Boom.' Up there with 1972's Chuck Berry's 'My Ding-a-Ling' as all-time embarrassing child-like ditties. (Yes, I thought they were subversive even then.)

Liberator posted on 2018-01-13 15:30:45   Reply   Private Reply


#14: Liberator    To: Pinguinite, Tooconservative (#1)

Speaking of musical deficiency, K-Tel had a habit of ignoring any theme whatsoever.

One one album you might have the Osmond's 'One Bad Apple' followed by Cream's 'White Room.' You really couldn't play the albums in front of your friends.

Liberator posted on 2018-01-13 15:34:01   Reply   Private Reply


#15: no gnu taxes    To: Liberator (#13)

Up there with 1972's Chuck Berry's 'My Ding-a-Ling' as all-time embarrassing child-like ditties.

Well, it was his only No. 1 hit.

Maybe it was his give up, sell out hit.

It was slightly amusing.

no gnu taxes posted on 2018-01-13 15:36:47   Reply   Private Reply


#16: Liberator    To: no gnu taxes (#8)

I always thought it was funny how in 2525, they obviously ran out of ideas for words that rhymed with 5. No problem; they just doubled the ante and started using 10.

The lyrics change from 6565 to 7510 was ok...They had to slow down the pace of mankind's technological self-destruction and insanity somehow :-)

How about that Spanish conquistador intro-hook?

Liberator posted on 2018-01-13 15:39:03   Reply   Private Reply


#17: Liberator    To: no gnu taxes (#15)

Well, it was his only No. 1 hit.

Maybe it was his give up, sell out hit.

A very baaaad #1. 1972 was a really competitive year for music too. It embarrassed me when it'd come on the radio.

It was a major sell-out, no doubt.

Liberator posted on 2018-01-13 15:43:12   Reply   Private Reply


#18: no gnu taxes    To: Liberator (#16)

I thought the song was dumb from the start.

However, I think you do, too.

So I won't argue with you.

no gnu taxes posted on 2018-01-13 15:49:49   Reply   Private Reply


#19: Deckard    To: Liberator, no gnu taxes (#17)

Well, it was his only No. 1 hit.

Maybe it was his give up, sell out hit.

A very baaaad #1. 1972 was a really competitive year for music too. It embarrassed me when it'd come on the radio.

I doubt that it was his (Berry's) decision to release that inane song as a single.

If it was - he himself should be embarrassed.

What a terrible song out of his dozens of R & R classics to be remembered for by so many people.

Deckard posted on 2018-01-13 16:23:35   Reply   Private Reply