After another night of rioting, Minneapolis police chief is warning protesters they will be cited and fined for violating social distancing mandates. The mayor was quoted as saying:It would be unjust to prosecute these disadvantaged youts for the rioting we are seeing - it is a direct response to years of systemic injustice. We would request that the protesters only attack symbols of "white privilege" and move the looting...er I mean taking merchandise from stores from the ghettos to the rich part of town. You know, because...reparations.
We believe that by issuing social distancing citations, we can quell this minor disturbance.
Several looters have praised the mayor for his progressive views, one is quoted as saying "The mayor be cool bro. He can come to my crib, hang out with me and my homies, drink some Colt 45 and watch one of my new television sets."
The mayor and police chief have accepted the invitation.
