[Home]  [Headlines]  [Latest Articles]  [Latest Comments]  [Post]  [Mail]  [Sign-in]  [Setup]  [Help]  [Register] 

For the cash: Ex-NFL player stages hate crime, trashes his businesses

Rep Jim Jordan’s passionate speech against Red Flag laws

Trump administration repeals the Obama era ‘clean water rule’ and that is a good thing

Our Favorite Price

PETITION: Throw out the illegal prosecution of General Michael Flynn. Prosecute the perpetrators.

Concerning Government and Mainstream Media: Believe Nothing, Question Everything

Martial Law Masquerading as Law and Order: The Police StateÂ’s Language of Force

Ric Ocasek, New Wave Rock Visionary and Cars Co-Founder, Is Dead

Saturday Night Live Fires New Cast Member Shane Gillis for Using Offensive Language

New storm rises over Kavanaugh

Vapers seek relief ... by turning to cigarettes

Same Gov’t Who’s Now Banning Flavored E-Cigs, Approved Candy-Flavored Amphetamines for Kids

Remember the Vallejo Cop Who Tackled a Veteran for Filming Him?

Blood, Delusions, and Corruption in the American West

Will Justin Amash Run for President as a Libertarian in 2020?

Ken Burns Delves into the Hardscrabble History of Country Music

"Remain in Mexico" immigration hearings begin in tents at border

Black Race Huslter Deray Accuses White Race Grifter Shaun King of Fleecing Donors, Demand He Stop His "Fundraising" Scams

Are Comedians Finally Fighting Back Against the Far Left’s Cultural Clampdown?

Pete Buttigieg’s Association With the Abortionist Who Stockpiled Baby Corpses in His Home Is Hardly Surprising

Elizabeth Warren’s Social Security Proposal Doesn’t Go Far Enough: It’s Time For A Basic (Retirement) Income

The CIA’s Influence Over the Media: Use of the Conspiracy Theorist Slur

Pete Buttigieg Chides Gun Owners Who Have ‘Sense of Manhood’ Wrapped Up in Guns

Is Vaping Marijuana Safe? Deaths and Lung Disease Linked to E-Cigs Call That Into Question

DOJ Inspector General Has Completed FISA Abuse Probe

Ohio gamer sentenced to 15 months prison in 'swatting' case

Court: FBI Must Destroy Memos Calling Antiwar.com a Threat

Trump administration enters new phase for border wall, sets ambitious timetable after securing land

Eddie Money, ‘Two Tickets to Paradise’ singer, dead at 70

Eighth Illegal Alien Charged with Rape in Same Maryland Sanctuary County

Free (with ads) Movie "The Wrecking Crew"

Judicial Watch Sued To Get Footage of The ‘Plane’ Hitting The Pentagon On 9/11 (Video)

Webb Wilder & The Beatnecks - Baby Please Don't Go

95 Percent of Americans Believe the Media is Full of Shit

Orange County deputy accidentally shoots himself while training

9/11 Solidified the Destruction of Our Freedom

The Orange Car Guy

AGW is “Paid to Find Out Who’s in Town”

Witness: Girls as young as 11 visited Jeffrey EpsteinÂ’s island in 2018

Christine Blasey Ford's Father Privately Supported Brett Kavanaught's Confirmation

'Way Too Far To The Left': Obama’s Homeland Security Secretary Skewers Democrats On Immigration

Biden Tried to Buy Putin’s Support for Iraq War With Promise of Oil Money

Clown World: Canadian Cancer Society Claims Men Without Cervixes Can Get Cervical Cancer

Revealed: You Know How Rush Limbaugh Talks About "Seminar Callers"? Turns Out They're Real -- Employed by a Joint Clinton-DNC Effort

Don’t look now, but there’s more border wall news

Psychedelic Science Just Got a Big Boost

The Bill of Rights Turns 230, and What Do We Have to Show for It? Nothing Good

Trump Replaces Bolton with Fringe Neocon

When Booze Was Banned but Pot Was Not

The 911 Commission Report: A 571-Page Lie


Status: Not Logged In; Sign In

Humor
See other Humor Articles

Title: San Francisco Changes Term 'Convicted Felons' To More Politically Correct 'Elected Officials'
Source: Babylon Bee
URL Source: https://babylonbee.com/news/san-fra ... ally-correct-elected-officials
Published: Aug 23, 2019
Author: Babylon Bee
Post Date: 2019-08-23 11:50:45 by nolu chan
Keywords: None
Views: 31

San Francisco Changes Term 'Convicted Felons' To More Politically Correct 'Elected Officials'

August 22nd, 2019

SAN FRANCISCO, CA—In a move to make sure criminals are treated fairly, San Francisco has instituted a policy of referring to "convicted felons" by the much more politically correct term "elected officials."

"These convicted felons are finding it harder to advance to higher political office when we keep bringing up their criminal activities," said San Francisco Mayor London Breed. "We must ensure they get a fair shake at ruining even more people's lives when they run for Congress, Senate, or the White House."

The city released a guide with ways to refer to politicians' activities in a more positive manner:

  • Stealing money is to be referred to as "taxation."
  • Having an affair is to be referred to as "providing women opportunities for advancement."
  • Taking a bribe is to be referred to as a "desirable exchange of money for principles."
  • Starting a deadly war on false pretenses is to be referred to as an "environmental depopulation initiative."
  • Kidnapping parents over truancy laws is to be called a "free parental vacation program."

The new language is to be used by all city officials, San Francisco residents, and the homeless population to ensure politicians aren't offended by any mention of their criminal activities. Anyone failing to abide by the law will be sentenced to continue living in San Francisco.

Post Comment   Private Reply   Ignore Thread  


[Home]  [Headlines]  [Latest Articles]  [Latest Comments]  [Post]  [Mail]  [Sign-in]  [Setup]  [Help]  [Register] 

Please report web page problems, questions and comments to webmaster@libertysflame.com