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Title: John Bolton Arrives In Office Excited To See So Many Familiar Wars
Source: The Onion
URL Source: https://politics.theonion.com/john- ... d-to-see-so-many-fa-1825149939
Published: Apr 10, 2018
Author: Staff
Post Date: 2018-04-18 07:46:41 by Deckard
Keywords: None
Views: 83
Comments: 4

Alternate text if image doesn't load

WASHINGTON—As he began his tenure serving as President Trump’s national security advisor, John Bolton reportedly arrived in the White House Tuesday excited to see so many familiar wars.

“Afghanistan and Iraq are still here? Man, things haven’t changed a bit,” said a thrilled Bolton while making the rounds in the West Wing, adding how happy he was to see so many military conflicts he recognized from his time serving in the Ronald Reagan, George H.W. Bush, and George W. Bush administrations.

“Wow, I can’t believe how many of the old War on Terror military campaigns are still around—Northwest Pakistan, Somalia, Libya—great to see them all. And Yemen was barely even a conflict when I was last here, and now it’s really come into its own. There are a few promising hostilities I haven’t become acquainted with that I’ve been hearing good things about, too, but overall, it feels like I can just pick up right where I left off.”

Bolton added that he was also excited to bring a few new wars aboard, mentioning North Korea, Iran, and Turkey as conflicts he wanted to work with.

Poster Comment:

Satire - but most likely right on the money.(1 image)

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#1. To: Deckard (#0)

He's my guy.

Vicomte13  posted on  2018-04-18   7:55:07 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#2. To: Vicomte13 (#1) (Edited)

And he got the job without having to shave the 'stache.

Rumor was that one reason Trump didn't pick him to start with was that Trump liked Tillerson's corporate grooming better.

Bolton has been in foreign policy circles a long time. He was never, contrary to some popular opinion and gossip, one of the ardent neocon types like a Wolfowitz or the Kagans. And they don't like him much either. That is not to say that Bolton is afraid to project American power to protect its interests overseas.

I think Bolton is his own man, not really a part of any clique of hawks or doves in the Beltway.

Tooconservative  posted on  2018-04-18   7:59:25 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#3. To: Tooconservative (#2)

I think Bolton is his own man, not really a part of any clique of hawks or doves in the Beltway.

I agree he's his own man. I think he's not a hawk like the clique - for economic interest - but more of an American eagle, like me.

Vicomte13  posted on  2018-04-18   14:54:00 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#4. To: Deckard (#0) (Edited)

I like his psychic abilities to induce strokes and heart attacks in corrupt, worthless, greedy piece-of-barack democRats.
I hope, with a little more training and concentration, he can just make them explode.

Hank Rearden  posted on  2018-04-18   17:39:36 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

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