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Humor
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Title: Heaviest Element known to man Discovered......
Source: [None]
URL Source: [None]
Published: Apr 23, 2016
Author: Unknown
Post Date: 2016-04-23 11:50:14 by Stoner
Keywords: None
Views: 903
Comments: 5

Heaviest Element known to man Discovered......

Lawrence Livermore Laboratories has discovered the heaviest element

yet known to science.

The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant

neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons,

giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which

are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.

Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can

be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes

into contact.

A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would

normally take less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years to complete.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2- 6 years.

It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a

portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.

In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time,

since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons,

forming isodopes.

This characteristic of morons promotion leads some scientists to

believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a

critical concentration.

This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.

When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an

element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons!!


Pretty accurate

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#1. To: Stoner (#0)

I was thinking this sounds like government in general! LOL

Justified  posted on  2016-04-23   11:52:42 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#2. To: Stoner (#0)

Too Funny! I love it!

Miraclerose  posted on  2016-04-23   14:15:07 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#3. To: Miraclerose (#2)

Glad you liked it!

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Stoner  posted on  2016-04-23   14:28:11 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#4. To: Stoner (#0) (Edited)

A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would

normally take less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years to complete.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2- 6 years.

Ah. Sounds like governmentium fuel must be what powers the Agile development process!

VxH  posted on  2016-04-23   17:17:19 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#5. To: Stoner (#0)

Genius,pure genius!

I was thinking they were going to say "Oprah".

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sneakypete  posted on  2016-04-23   18:58:41 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


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