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'EaTing while black'... N.Y. Times admiTs eliTe college scapegoaTed janiTors in race hoax --- Officials appeased sTudenT who claimed she was profiled

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Humor
See other Humor Articles

Title: Heaviest Element known to man Discovered......
Source: [None]
URL Source: [None]
Published: Apr 23, 2016
Author: Unknown
Post Date: 2016-04-23 11:50:14 by Stoner
Keywords: None
Views: 507
Comments: 5

Heaviest Element known to man Discovered......

Lawrence Livermore Laboratories has discovered the heaviest element

yet known to science.

The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant

neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons,

giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which

are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.

Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can

be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes

into contact.

A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would

normally take less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years to complete.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2- 6 years.

It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a

portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.

In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time,

since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons,

forming isodopes.

This characteristic of morons promotion leads some scientists to

believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a

critical concentration.

This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.

When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an

element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons!!


Pretty accurate

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#1. To: Stoner (#0)

I was thinking this sounds like government in general! LOL

Justified  posted on  2016-04-23   11:52:42 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#2. To: Stoner (#0)

Too Funny! I love it!

Miraclerose  posted on  2016-04-23   14:15:07 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#3. To: Miraclerose (#2)

Glad you liked it!

Si vis pacem, para bellum

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Rebellion to tyrants is obedience to God.

There are no Carthaginian terrorists.

President Obama is the greatest hoax ever perpetrated on the American people. --Clint Eastwood

"I am concerned for the security of our great nation; not so much because of any threat from without, but because of the insidious forces working from within." -- General Douglas MacArthur

Stoner  posted on  2016-04-23   14:28:11 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#4. To: Stoner (#0) (Edited)

A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would

normally take less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years to complete.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2- 6 years.

Ah. Sounds like governmentium fuel must be what powers the Agile development process!

VxH  posted on  2016-04-23   17:17:19 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#5. To: Stoner (#0)

Genius,pure genius!

I was thinking they were going to say "Oprah".

BOYCOTT PAYPAL AND CLOSE YOUR PP ACCOUNTS NOW! ENCOURAGE OTHERS TO DO SO,TOO!

ISLAM MEANS SUBMISSION!

Why is democracy held in such high esteem when it’s the enemy of the minority and makes all rights relative to the dictates of the majority? (Ron Paul,2012)

American Indians had open borders. Look at how well that worked out for them.

sneakypete  posted on  2016-04-23   18:58:41 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


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