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Humor
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Title: Indiana Governor Stunned By How Many People Seem to Have Gay Friends
Source: The New Yorker
URL Source: http://www.newyorker.com/humor/boro ... eople-seem-to-have-gay-friends
Published: Mar 30, 2015
Author: Andy Borowitz
Post Date: 2015-03-30 17:27:15 by Willie Green
Keywords: None
Views: 1113
Comments: 9

INDIANAPOLIS (The Borowitz Report)—Indiana Governor Mike Pence is “stunned and amazed” that so many people appear to have gay friends, Pence has confirmed.

Speaking to reporters in his office in Indianapolis, Pence said that he made the astonishing discovery about gay friends late last week.

“A lot of everyday people have gay friends, and they’re not afraid to call and/or e-mail you to tell you that,” Pence said. “To be honest, I’m still trying to process it all.”

Pence said that from what he has been able to gather thus far, the phenomenon of “ordinary folks” having gay friends “has been going on for years.”

“You could be walking down the street, and without you knowing it, this person is friends with gays and that person is, too,” he said. “It really seems to be pretty widespread.”

“It’s the darnedest thing,” he added.

While Pence acknowledged that he has “no gay friends personally,” the growing popularity of being friends with gays has made him question whether he has been “missing the boat on this.”

“When I see so many people having gay friends, it makes me wonder if I should go out and get one,” he said. “But I guess that would be kind of hard for me to do now.”

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#1. To: Willie Green (#0)

This nation gets darker every day.

Don  posted on  2015-03-30   17:53:41 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#2. To: Don (#1)

You got that right, he's doubting what he did just because he hasn't figured out all those e-mails are coming from 5-10 people with hundreds/thousands of e-mail addresses.

“Political correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, illogical minority, and rapidly promoted by mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end.”

CZ82  posted on  2015-03-30   18:35:49 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#3. To: Willie Green (#0) (Edited)

Those against fear monger the homo hate... and those for it, really don't know how to defend and explain what this protects.

This protects the constitutional rights of BUSINESS OWNERS. Instead of using religion as the catalyst... how about we protect the rights of property owners. I should be able to toss anyone out of my HOME, for any reason... and I should be able to toss anyone out of my business for any reason.

To defend this, it's simple. Take the homo argument and reverse it...

If a black man owned a dry cleaning business... and I walked in dressed in a Klan uniform... and told the black business owner to dry clean, press and fold my Klan uniforms... and I stood there telling him... "Boy, clean my fuckin sheets".... do you think he should have to cater to me?

When you own a non public funded business or a private home... your rights to evict people outtrump their feelings to be accepted. PERIOD.

Every society gets the kind of criminal it deserves. What is equally true is that every community gets the kind of law enforcement it insists on. Robert Kennedy

GrandIsland  posted on  2015-03-30   18:56:39 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#4. To: CZ82 (#2)

People are very gullible. It's like stuffing ballot boxes and people believe the election is above board.

Don  posted on  2015-03-30   19:19:54 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#5. To: Willie Green (#0)

The Unhappy Ones, along with the fifth column in the media, are going to beat up Pence so badly that he'll be donning the knee pads and searching out a stiffy within a month.

Vinny  posted on  2015-03-30   19:36:38 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#6. To: Vinny (#5)

The just want to make sure that he won't try to run for president, normal operating procedure.

“Political correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, illogical minority, and rapidly promoted by mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end.”

CZ82  posted on  2015-03-30   19:48:37 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#7. To: Don (#4)

Gullible or trusting I'm not sure which.

“Political correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, illogical minority, and rapidly promoted by mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end.”

CZ82  posted on  2015-03-30   20:04:01 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#8. To: Willie Green (#0)

I don't have any fag friends. Don't know any fags. It would be gay to have a gay friend.

A K A Stone  posted on  2015-03-30   21:04:43 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#9. To: Don (#1)

Take a trip to Holiday World. I was looking for a good waterpark to take the kids to last year. It has a great waterpark. And an ok amusement park.

http://www.holidayworld.com/

A K A Stone  posted on  2015-03-30   21:06:55 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


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