Announcing the 2nd Annual Helen Thomas Look Alike Contest! 
 
 
 This major media event will be held on the White House lawn on March 21 of each year. 
 
 Contestant eligibility: 
 -Age limit: No one under 75 is eligible. There is no upper limit. 
 -Ugly men and transvestites encouraged to enter. 
 -Must be at least 50 lbs. overweight(weigh-in before event dinner). 
 -Democrats only (bring proof of registration). 
 -Speech impediment is a plus. 
 -Wrinkle volume subject to confirmation using mass spectrometry 
 -Each Contestant is soley responsible for his/her make-up costs 
 -All results are final 
 
 Grand prize: 
 Two free Botox appointments with the best dermatologist/plastic surgeon in Baghdad. Contestant pays all air fare and living expenses, or 
 A weekend in Washington, D.C. with Helen Thomas. Winner must sleep with Helen at least two nights in her luxury condominium. Contestant responsible for all post-Helen trauma therapy and drugs. 
 
 Consolation Prize 
 Two weekends with Helen in DC. 
 
 Madeline Albright, winner of the 2006 contest, will be selling "I Survived Sleeping With Helen Thomas" T-Shirts at DNC headquaters after the contest ends. 
 
 
 Tell a Friend!