Humor
See other Humor Articles
Title: New Federal Golf Regulations
Source:
E-Mail
URL Source: http://N/A
Published: May 28, 2012
Author: ME
Post Date: 2012-05-28 16:16:13 by CZ82
Keywords: None
Views: 1552
Comments: 3
New Federal Golf Regulations Since these new golf rules just went into effect as of January 1, 2012, please share with fellow golfers. The President has recently appointed a Golf Czar, and major rule changes in the game of golf will become effective January 1, 2012. This is only a preview as the complete rule book (expect 2800 pages) is being rewritten as we speak. Here are a few of the changes: Golfers with handicaps: - below 10 will have their green fees increased by 35%. - between 11 and 18 will see no increase in green fees. - above 18 will get a $20 check each time they play. The term "gimme" will be changed to "entitlement" and will be used as follows: - handicaps below 10, no entitlements. - handicaps from 11 to 17, entitlements for putter length putts. - handicaps above 18, if your ball is on green, no need to putt, just pick it up. These entitlements are intended to bring about fairness and, most importantly, equality in scoring. In addition, a player will be limited to a maximum of one birdie or six pars in any given 18-hole round. Any excess must be given to those fellow players who have not yet scored a birdie or par. Only after all players have received a birdie or par from the player actually making the birdie or par, can that player begin to count his pars and birdies again. The current USGA handicap system will be used for the above purposes, but the term "net score" will be available only for scoring those players with handicaps of 18 and above. This is intended to "re-distribute" the success of winning by making sure that in every competition, the above 18 handicap players will post only "net score" against every other player's gross score. These new rules are intended to CHANGE the game of golf. Golf must be about fairness. It should have nothing to do with ability, hard work, practice, and responsibility!!
Poster Comment: So will everybody get a trophy just for attending???
Post Comment Private Reply Ignore Thread
Top • Page Up • Full Thread • Page Down • Bottom/Latest
#1. To: CZ82 (#0)
Where is Happy Gilmore?
I heard he got attacked by the gopher from Caddyshack and had to have his foot amputated....
Leftardism/Liberalism: The chickenschitt way to deal with life’s problems by creating solutions to problems that don’t exist, thereby creating a problem where none existed before and then having to find a solution to that one…
They all get Nobel Peace Prizes.
Obama's watch stopped on 24 May 2008, but he's been too busy smoking crack to notice.
#2. To: buckeroo (#1)
Where is Happy Gilmore?
#3. To: CZ82, *Ron Paul for President* (#0)
So will everybody get a trophy just for attending???
"We (government) need to do a lot less, a lot sooner" ~Ron Paul
Top • Page Up • Full Thread • Page Down • Bottom/Latest
[Home] [Headlines] [Latest Articles] [Latest Comments] [Post] [Mail] [Sign-in] [Setup] [Help] [Register]