The endangered spotted owls are celebrating today on the news that President Obama has finally given the go ahead to knock off their mortal enemies: The dreaded barred owl. Don’t start hyperventilating just yet, the reason behind the coming bloodbath is simple really. Barred owls are raving lunatics, their aggressiveness is causing the more docile spotted owl’s numbers to decline rapidly, forcing President Obama to take drastic measures.
The Washington Post:
We can’t ignore the mounting evidence that competition from barred owls is a major factor in the spotted owl’s decline, and we have a clear obligation to do all we can to prevent the spotted owl’s extinction and help it rebound,” said Fish and Wildlife Service Director Dan Ashe.
The president is going to set aside some land (millions of acres) for the spotted owl’s in the hopes that its population increases. As for their terrorist counterparts, President Obama is going to send in the drones .
