Fascist New York City Mayor is at it again. Has he gone too far this time? Mr. Mayor-for-Life has again interfered with City Life in the Big Apple, and the tiny but vocal Spandex-Lycra cyclist/biker community is not at all happy about it. Said one red-nosed, gin-breath representative cryptically called, "dwarf": "It's my entire wardrobe! Now what??"
In Bloomberg's defense, the city's Third World taxi-drivers have complained about the distraction of shiny, iridescent costumes of red, blue, purple and rainbow, and "entitlement" attitude while these militants pedals through NYC streets; Then it was the FEDEX drivers; Then it was Hell's Angels. Then everyone else.
We at the Spandex-Lycra Gazette now see the point. What the hell were we thinkin' by wearing the damn Spandex OR Lycra onesies 24/7 Or even 1/1? We apologize. We're going back to the old-school standby: short (very short) cut-off jeans and wife-beater tee. It'll work out better for us in the long run when pedaling through the Village. OR certain parts of Alaska.
Poster Comment:
Wow - It's not fair. What a crazy world. Actually, what a crazy city.
P.S. - Isn't Mayor Bloomberg gay?