1. Ron Paul took a lie detector test. The lie detector tapped out.
2. Ron Paul is an element on the periodic table.
3. Ron Paul could lead a horse to water AND convince it to drink, but he doesn't believe the government has the right to so he refuses.
4. King Midas shook hands with Ron Paul once. Nothing happened.
5. Studies by the World Health Organization show that Ron Paul is the leading cause of freedom among men.
6. Ron Paul wasn't born. He liberated himself from the womb.
7. The chief export of Ron Paul is liberty.
8. When fascism goes to sleep at night, it checks under the bed for Ron Paul.
9. Ron Paul eats Total Gyms for breakfast.
10. If Ron Paul had lived in Sparta, the movie would have been called "1".
11.When Chuck Norris gets scared, he goes to Ron Paul.
12.Ron Paul lost his virginity to Susan B. Anthony.
13.Ron Paul doesn't cut taxes, He kills them with his bare hands.
14.Ron Paul delivers babies without his hands. He simply reads them the Bill of Rights and they crawl out in anticipation of freedom.
15.If you pull Ron Paul's finger, a band will march by playing Yankee Doodle Dandy.