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Humor
See other Humor Articles

Title: Civilized Flames
Source: [None]
URL Source: [None]
Published: Jan 28, 2011
Author: sneakypete
Post Date: 2011-01-28 12:47:04 by sneakypete
Ping List: *Humor*     Subscribe to *Humor*
Keywords: None
Views: 5350
Comments: 10

These glorious insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words.

The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor: She said, "If you were my husband I'd poison your tea." He said, "If you were my wife, I'd drink it."

A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease." "That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or your mistress."

"He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr

"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." -Winston Churchill

"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." Clarence Darrow

"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).

"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it." - Moses Hadas

"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain

"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.." - Oscar Wilde

"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend.... if you have one." - George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill "Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second... if there is one." - Winston Churchill, in response.

"I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." - Stephen Bishop

"He is a self-made man and worships his creator." - John Bright

"I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial." - Irvin S. Cobb

"He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others." - Samuel Johnson

"He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." - Paul Keating

"In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." -Charles, Count Talleyrand

"He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." - Forrest Tuckeruncl

"Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" - Mark Twain

"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." - Mae West

"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go." - Oscar Wilde

"He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination." - Andrew Lang (1844-1912)

"He has Van Gogh's ear for music." - Billy Wilder

"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." - Groucho Marx


Poster Comment:

I figured I'd post this after all the recent discussions about people insulting each other here and other places. Subscribe to *Humor*

Post Comment   Private Reply   Ignore Thread  


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#1. To: sneakypete (#0)

In other words, you can't or won't give up the insults as part of your posting personality?

"Keep Your Goddamn Government Hands Off My Medicare!" - Various Tea Party signs.

Godwinson  posted on  2011-01-28   12:52:10 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#2. To: Godwinson (#1)

Can't we all just get along? BWAHAHAHAHAHHA!!!!!

Well, [war's] got to do something for attention, his multiple personalities aren't speaking to him any more, and his imaginary friends keep finding excuses not to come over.

Rudgear  posted on  2011-01-28   13:01:50 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#3. To: Godwinson (#1)

In other words, you can't or won't give up the insults as part of your posting personality?

And you got that out of me posting a thread about civilized insults?

Here's one even you can understand. Eat shit and die.

"I adore John McCain, support him 100 percent and will do everything I can to support his reelection. As everyone knows, I was honored and proud to run with him. And Todd and I were with him in D.C. just a week ago." (Sarah Palin,Dec 2009) ************************************ DID Palin say or write these things or not? (Me) I don't know or F ing care. (Mad Dog posted on 2009-12-26 16:36:33 ET,post # 105 http://libertysflame.com/cgi-bin/readart.cgi?ArtNum=5510&Disp=114#C114)

sneakypete  posted on  2011-01-28   18:43:58 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#4. To: sneakypete (#3)

And you got that out of me posting a thread about civilized insults?

Here's one even you can understand. Eat shit and die.

That guy's a frickin loon.

I wonder why he even posts here.

Maybe he is really a conservative just out to make liberals look bad by pretending to be one and repeating the most absurd of their positions.

That, or he just a petulant idiot.

no gnu taxes  posted on  2011-01-28   18:48:28 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#5. To: no gnu taxes (#4)

That guy's a frickin loon.

I wonder why he even posts here.

He came over here to flame me.

"I adore John McCain, support him 100 percent and will do everything I can to support his reelection. As everyone knows, I was honored and proud to run with him. And Todd and I were with him in D.C. just a week ago." (Sarah Palin,Dec 2009) ************************************ DID Palin say or write these things or not? (Me) I don't know or F ing care. (Mad Dog posted on 2009-12-26 16:36:33 ET,post # 105 http://libertysflame.com/cgi-bin/readart.cgi?ArtNum=5510&Disp=114#C114)

sneakypete  posted on  2011-01-28   18:55:48 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#6. To: sneakypete (#5)

He came over here to flame me.

It would seem he failed- again.

Considering how much shit the guy eats, it's amazing he still posts here at all.

I mean, how many more times can the moron be handed his own head, before he finally gets the HINT?

Oh, BTW... I liked the quotes. Good stuff!

"There will be no more money when the U.S. dollar has no value, until that time we can keep printing more." -- go65, LF's answer to Ben Bernanke --

Capitalist Eric  posted on  2011-01-28   18:58:14 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#7. To: Godwinson (#1)

This is a very humorous thread topic.

You are the type of person who would die and go to hell and sent all eternity complaining about the climate control system and dunning the devil for the phone number for the local ACLU office to complain about how your rights are being trampled on there.

You would also bore everyone with how upset you were the noose used to hang you was improperly tied as you counted only twelve wraps in the knot instead of the requisite thirteen.

Ferret Mike  posted on  2011-01-28   20:02:49 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#8. To: Ferret Mike (#7)

You are the type of person who would die and go to hell and sent all eternity complaining about the climate control system and dunning the devil for the phone number for the local ACLU office to complain about how your rights are being trampled on there.

Probably my Catholic upbringing would have me do that.

"Keep Your Goddamn Government Hands Off My Medicare!" - Various Tea Party signs.

Godwinson  posted on  2011-01-28   20:33:03 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#9. To: Godwinson (#8)

my Catholic upbringing would have me do that

I blame the clergy for not beating you enough.

Hondo68  posted on  2011-01-29   3:12:41 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#10. To: hondo68 (#9)

Why? Are you a child molester?

"Keep Your Goddamn Government Hands Off My Medicare!" - Various Tea Party signs.

Godwinson  posted on  2011-01-29   3:44:38 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


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