President Obama has set a new low standard for US Presidents by appearing on The (wrong) View, the Ellen Degenerate show and now the John Stewart show. After appearing on those pitiful, leftist programs, President Obama and his team decided to open his appearances up to car washes, bars, car lots…but not Bar Mitzvahs…those Jooos might be loyal to Israel! President Barack Hussein Obama will make a personal appearance at Sudsy’s Car Wash in Paterson, New Jersey to help celebrate the grand opening and cut the ribbon on this true American success story. Sudsy’s is creating 12 full-time jobs after receiving a grant of $130 million dollars from the Obama administration Stimulus Bill. Sudsy’s Car Wash owner Ahmed Abdul Muhammad said:
“We welcome Imam Obama to grand opening of Sudzy’s Car Wash. Today, is first time in adult life Ahmed is proud of new country…the Great Satan!”
President Obama is expected to greet customers of Sudsy’s and give each a personally signed copy of the Koran at the appearance. His spokesperson Robert Gibbs said:
“The opening of Sudsy’s Car Wash is further proof that the Stimulus Bill is creating jobs in America. Ahmed Abdul Muhammad, a recent immigrant to this country from Gaza, represents the fulfillment of the American Dream!”
To celebrate the grand opening of Sudsy’s, owner Muhammad has announced the following car wash and service specials:
-HOPE (your car isn’t repossessed) and CHANGE your oil service – $25
-Wash for Clunkers standard car wash – $10
-ArmorAll anti-IED tire service (you will be blown away at how good your tires look!)
-Obama Stimulus gas additive (it costs $500 but doesn’t do anything!)
-ObamaCare Lifetime Guarantee – you can take your car to any car wash in the city but must wait 12 months for service
-Special Backseat Cleaning – you want a clean place for all your Republican friends – $5
-Annual Towing Service – we’ll pull you out in case your Republican friends drive your car in the ditch – $250
-Toweliban Wax Service – we use only the finest waxes. Your car will shine as brilliant as the eyes of Muhammad’s 6 year old bride!
Yes, after a visit to Sudsy’s, your car will be as beautiful as an Arab oil sheiks palace after your car is burqa-buffed by the highly-trained, highly-motivated Islamic all female staff. They’ll make your car look brand new or wish they had!
So come on down to Sudsy’s Car Wash grand opening and meet President Obama this Saturday from 1-4 pm! Have him personally sign your very own Koran while your car gets a cleaning fit for Allah!
