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Bible Study
See other Bible Study Articles

Title: The Bible,Dr. Laura,and them damn homos!
Source: email
URL Source: [None]
Published: Aug 10, 2010
Author: James M. Kauffman
Post Date: 2010-08-10 09:33:13 by sneakypete
Keywords: None
Views: 97324
Comments: 137

In her radio show, Dr Laura Schlesinger said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22, and cannot be condoned under any circumstance.

The following response is an open letter to Dr. Laura, written by a US man, and posted on the Internet. It's funny, as well as informative:

Dear Dr. Laura:

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination ... End of debate.

I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some other elements of God's Laws and how to follow them.

1. Leviticus 25:44 states that I may possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of Menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15: 19-24. The problem is how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

4. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or should I ask the police to do it?

6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination, Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this? Are there 'degrees' of abomination?

7. Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle-room here?

8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?

9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev.19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair, like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14) I know you have studied these things extensively and thus enjoy considerable expertise in such matters, so I'm confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.

Your adoring fan.

James M. Kauffman, Ed.D. Professor Emeritus, Dept. Of Curriculum, Instruction, and Special Education University of Virginia PS (It would be a damn shame if we couldn't own a Canadian)

Click for Full Text!


Poster Comment:

I like the part about Canadians best of all.

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Begin Trace Mode for Comment # 118.

#12. To: Liberator, AKA Stone, All (#0)

How long are you two going to hide from this thread?

Enquiring minds,and all dat.

sneakypete  posted on  2010-08-10   20:16:10 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#13. To: Abu el Banat, war, no gnu taxes, Bartcoprules, mininggold, Liberator, AKA Stone, All (#12)

Is it just me,or do Liberator and AKA Stone seem to be ignoring my pings to this thread?

Gee,I wonder why?

sneakypete  posted on  2010-08-10   21:24:32 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#50. To: sneakypete (#13)

Is it just me,or do Liberator and AKA Stone seem to be ignoring my pings to this thread?

Gee,I wonder why?

Yeah, I'm real skeerd of your ping to this dopey queer propaganda.

You've become quite the useful idiot.

Liberator  posted on  2010-08-11   22:15:55 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#71. To: Liberator (#50)

Yeah, I'm real skeerd of your ping to this dopey queer propaganda.

You must be scared of it because you have refused to even try to address the biblical quotes.

I find it very interesting that you refer to biblical passages as "queer propaganda",though.

sneakypete  posted on  2010-08-12   1:56:37 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#88. To: sneakypete (#71)

Yeah, I'm real skeerd of your ping to this dopey queer propaganda.

You must be scared of it because you have refused to even try to address the biblical quotes.

Is THAT what was expected of me? To be your Pastor and explain the Scripture of Leviticus and refute "GOTCHA" questions?

Try a Bible class if you really GAS.

I find it very interesting that you refer to biblical passages as "queer propaganda",though.

It's not? Who are you shittin'? The questions weren't only NOT seriously asked, but were carefully crafted written by a p*ssed off Gay to supposedly discredit Dr. Laura.

FWIW, the context of "slavery" in the Bible is totally different than what you and other gay propagandists convey.

Liberator  posted on  2010-08-12   11:17:41 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#90. To: Liberator (#88)

FWIW, the context of "slavery" in the Bible is totally different than what you and other gay propagandists convey.

well that's bullshit.

war  posted on  2010-08-12   11:20:19 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#92. To: war (#90)

well that's bullshit.

YOU of all people aren't qualified to challenge that assertion.

Liberator  posted on  2010-08-12   11:26:10 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#97. To: Liberator (#92) (Edited)

I know that Bible 100 tiems better than you can ever hope to.

That said, slavery, more accurately, servitiude, has SEVERAL contexts within the bible as both the Latin and the Greek terms for servitude evolved before, during and after the Bible was being written.

Also, as it was at out founding, there were various levels of servitude; indentured was certainly different from involuntary.

So, some "slave" references in the Bible were to indentured servitude and the passage sometimes makes that clear as in the case of a slave being bound as a reult of theft. But, certainly, Hebrews would bind prisoners of war into involuntary servitude. The Romans certainly had slaves as we understood them to be.

Thus, I stand by my statement that yours was bullshit.

war  posted on  2010-08-12   11:44:19 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#99. To: war (#97)

So, some "slave" references in the Bible were to indentured servitude and the passage sometimes makes that clear as in the case of a slave being bound as a reult of theft. But, certainly, Hebrews would bind prisoners of war into involuntary servitude. The Romans certainly had slaves as we understood them to be.

And THAT would be in violation of Biblical law.

According to one source:

God provided a realistic approach to the issues of the times. Slavery is definitely not the optimal form of relationship for individuals, but for most of the world's history it is a reality. Therefore, the Bible addresses slavery and provides certain safeguards to make sure that slave would not be mistreated and that their humanity would be respected.

* Slavery was designed so that the poor could seek protection - this is noted in Leviticus (Lev 25.35-43). It's driven by the need of the individual who is poor.

* Slaves were to be recognized as human beings first and foremost, not property or chattel. Verse 40 states "He is to be treated as a hired worker or a temporary resident among you".

* Slavery had a specific time of service and afterward were allowed to go free. Note that the passage above even includes the family of the slave so as not to break up the family unit.

* As an owner, you couldn't "cook the books". A big problem in those days was the charging of exorbitant interest so that slaves would stay indebted to their masters forever (remember Jacob and Laban?). Here, God specifically declares that this practice is forbidden.

Thus, I stand by my statement that yours was bullshit.

I expect nothing less from you. Thank you.

Liberator  posted on  2010-08-12   12:11:40 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#103. To: Liberator (#99) (Edited)

And THAT would be in violation of Biblical law.

Chapter and verse please.

Thanks.

"Then Abraham took his son Ishmael and all the slaves born in his house or bought with his money..."

How was one "born" into slavery...biblically speaking, of course...?

war  posted on  2010-08-12   12:26:33 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#105. To: war (#103)

Chapter and verse please.

Am I now your Pastor? But I thought YOU were the Bible scholar?

Prove my assertion wrong. IF you can.

"Then Abraham took his son Ishmael and all the slaves born in his house >b>or bought with his money..." How was one "born" into slavery...biblically speaking, of course...?

Google is your friend...and source of Biblical Scholarship - not me.

Good luck.

Liberator  posted on  2010-08-12   12:42:25 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#110. To: Liberator (#105) (Edited)

Am I now your Pastor?

Nope.

Prove my assertion wrong. IF you can.

Lookit behind you, Zeke; I just did. What you "claim" is against "biblical law" is in fact nothing of the sort. In other words, Hiram, there is NO chapter or verse that supports your assertion.

Google is your friend...

I already know the answer. A child was born into slavery because he/she was born of a slave who, by law, was unwed. The baby, therefore, became the property of the master.

But feel free to continue to show me how vastly superior your knowledge of the bible is over mine. It's slow here and I need to be amused.

war  posted on  2010-08-12   13:14:11 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#113. To: war (#110)

Lookit behind you, Zeke; I just did. What you "claim" is against "biblical law" is in fact nothing of the sort. In other words, Hiram, there is NO chapter or verse that supports your assertion.

Not quite. Half-baked still isn't a fait accompli.

A chhild born into slavery was born of a slave who, by law, was unwed. The baby, therefore, became the property of the master.

If a male slave had been given a wife by his owner, then the wife and any children which had resulted from the union would remain the property of his former owner. The law's guidelines of protection (as stated above) still applied.

But feel free to continue to show me how vastly superior your knowledge of the bible is over mine. It's slow here and I need to be amused.

I'm half-busy, though my level of amusement by you supersedes yours ;-)

You may possess a by-rote "knowledge" of the Bible, but it you can't understand its connective narrative, it doesn't do you a whole lotta good. That must be frustrating - seriously.

Liberator  posted on  2010-08-12   13:36:25 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#116. To: Liberator (#113) (Edited)

You may possess a by-rote "knowledge" of the Bible, but it you can't understand its connective narrative

I sure know double talk when I see it and I just have.

PS: Male slaves were given consorts not wives.

PPS: Here's how Moses disposed of his spoils of war.

war  posted on  2010-08-12   13:51:10 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#118. To: war (#116)

PPS: Here's how Moses disposed of his spoils of war.

There was reason for the treatment of the Midianites:

__

The Lord spake unto Moses, Avenge the children of Israel of the Midianites--a semi-nomad people, descended from Abraham and Keturah, occupying a tract of country east and southeast of Moab, which lay on the eastern coast of the Dead Sea. They seem to have been the principal instigators of the infamous scheme of seduction, planned to entrap the Israelites into the double crime of idolatry and licentiousness [Numbers 25:1-3,17,18] by which, it was hoped, the Lord would withdraw from that people the benefit of His protection and favor. Moreover, the Midianites had rendered themselves particularly obnoxious by entering into a hostile league with the Amorites (Joshua 13:21). The Moabites were at this time spared in consideration of Lot (Deuteronomy 2:9) and because the measure of their iniquities was not yet full. God spoke of avenging "the children of Israel" (Numbers 31:2); Moses spoke of avenging the Lord (Numbers 31:3), as dishonor had been done to God and an injury inflicted on His people. The interests were identical. God and His people have the same cause, the same friends, and the same assailants. This, in fact, was a religious war, undertaken by the express command of God against idolaters, who had seduced the Israelites to practise their abominations.

no gnu taxes  posted on  2010-08-12   14:04:06 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


Replies to Comment # 118.

#120. To: no gnu taxes (#118)

Moses spoke of avenging the Lord (Numbers 31:3), as dishonor had been done to God and an injury inflicted on His people.

How come the guy who created the entire universe didn't choose everybody as "his people"? What's he got against the non-Jews?

On the other hand, considering how he's treated the Jews, I think the other peoples caught a big break.

Skip Intro  posted on  2010-08-12 14:07:24 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#122. To: no gnu taxes (#118)

Yea and?

I've read the Bible, Paddy...more times than I can count...

war  posted on  2010-08-12 14:21:36 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


End Trace Mode for Comment # 118.

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