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Bible Study
See other Bible Study Articles

Title: The Bible,Dr. Laura,and them damn homos!
Source: email
URL Source: [None]
Published: Aug 10, 2010
Author: James M. Kauffman
Post Date: 2010-08-10 09:33:13 by sneakypete
Keywords: None
Views: 99041
Comments: 137

In her radio show, Dr Laura Schlesinger said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22, and cannot be condoned under any circumstance.

The following response is an open letter to Dr. Laura, written by a US man, and posted on the Internet. It's funny, as well as informative:

Dear Dr. Laura:

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination ... End of debate.

I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some other elements of God's Laws and how to follow them.

1. Leviticus 25:44 states that I may possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of Menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15: 19-24. The problem is how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

4. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or should I ask the police to do it?

6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination, Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this? Are there 'degrees' of abomination?

7. Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle-room here?

8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?

9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev.19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair, like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14) I know you have studied these things extensively and thus enjoy considerable expertise in such matters, so I'm confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.

Your adoring fan.

James M. Kauffman, Ed.D. Professor Emeritus, Dept. Of Curriculum, Instruction, and Special Education University of Virginia PS (It would be a damn shame if we couldn't own a Canadian)

Click for Full Text!


Poster Comment:

I like the part about Canadians best of all.

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Begin Trace Mode for Comment # 111.

#12. To: Liberator, AKA Stone, All (#0)

How long are you two going to hide from this thread?

Enquiring minds,and all dat.

sneakypete  posted on  2010-08-10   20:16:10 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#13. To: Abu el Banat, war, no gnu taxes, Bartcoprules, mininggold, Liberator, AKA Stone, All (#12)

Is it just me,or do Liberator and AKA Stone seem to be ignoring my pings to this thread?

Gee,I wonder why?

sneakypete  posted on  2010-08-10   21:24:32 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#14. To: sneakypete (#13)

First I saw of it.

A K A Stone  posted on  2010-08-10   21:26:31 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#24. To: A K A Stone (#14)

First I saw of it.

Ok,so according to the scripture and your understanding of the US Constitution,can I own my own Canadian? If not,why not?

sneakypete  posted on  2010-08-10   22:58:53 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#57. To: sneakypete, A K A Stone (#24)

Ok,so according to the scripture and your understanding of the US Constitution,can I own my own Canadian?

Yes, but only if the Canadian consents, ands he's queer, an atheist, and bitter anti-Christian troll like his master.

Liberator  posted on  2010-08-11   22:38:39 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#59. To: Liberator, stinkypants little man (#57)

and bitter anti-Christian troll like his master.

You sure have little "man"'s number L.

There are plenty of other adjectives that you could also add, but that sure will do.

Mad Dog  posted on  2010-08-11   22:44:49 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#60. To: Mad Dog, sneakypete (#59)

You sure have little "man"'s number L.

There are plenty of other adjectives that you could also add, but that sure will do.

For some reason, Pete believes Christians are plotting to rule the world and oppress him. At the same time he's shilling for the Gay Militant Agenda. Go figure.

Liberator  posted on  2010-08-11   22:53:17 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#75. To: Liberator (#60)

For some reason, Pete believes Christians are plotting to rule the world and oppress him.

Because of their own words and their stated goals.

At the same time he's shilling for the Gay Militant Agenda. Go figure.

No,I just believe that all citizens should be treated equally and that we all have the same rights,regardless of race,religion,or any other outside factor. You and the other thumpers can't handle that because you think you are special and deserving of special rights.

sneakypete  posted on  2010-08-12   2:08:09 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#95. To: sneakypete (#75)

Did any of these LP dickwads actually explain why it's ok to pick and choose what requirements of god it's ok to ignore, and why, or are they just doing their normal act and calling everyone a homo?

Skip Intro  posted on  2010-08-12   11:34:35 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#108. To: Skip Intro (#95)

Did any of these LP dickwads actually explain why it's ok to pick and choose what requirements of god it's ok to ignore, and why, or are they just doing their normal act and calling everyone a homo?

No,and they never will because they don't know themselves. None of them are capable of making their own decisions,and need a leader to step forward and tell them what to think and say. That's why they join churches and political parties.

sneakypete  posted on  2010-08-12   13:02:42 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#111. To: sneakypete (#108)

None of them are capable of making their own decisions,and need a leader to step forward and tell them what to think and say. That's why they join churches and political parties.

You ARE funny though.

Yeah - we're not like you and Skippy. Youse guys are your OWN "leader." Sheeet - what cult is it again whose motto is, "Follow me...into the darkness or ignorance and reject God...because I don't understand Him"?

We're all individually responsible for any effort in understanding Him, His words, and His Plan, Pete. IF you sincerely want answers, you'll seek and find them; If not you won't - it's that simple. Yeah, I know it's a sh*tty world sometimes, but we all have to deal with it.

Liberator  posted on  2010-08-12   13:17:00 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


Replies to Comment # 111.

#112. To: Liberator (#111)

We're all individually responsible for any effort in understanding Him, His words, and His Plan

From reading your contributions here, you need to study harder...

war  posted on  2010-08-12 13:18:33 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


End Trace Mode for Comment # 111.

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