Breitbart writer Kevin Pezzi's sockpuppet MySpace harem
August 05, 2010 2:31 pm ET by Simon Maloy
If you haven't yet become acquainted with Kevin Pezzi, the racist doctor/sex "expert"/robot chef builder who now writes for Andrew Breitbart's BigGovernment.com, you'd be well served to click over to Media Matters' profile and explore the many bizarre and disturbing facets of Pezzi's background. The man is quite clearly a huckster, and basically everything he does is aimed at selling copies of his e-books, which deal largely with sex. To that end, he's apparently created at least six fake MySpace profiles of women -- most of them featuring badly photoshopped stock images of models with large breasts -- claiming to be enthralled with Dr. Pezzi and his sex books.
Let's run them down in alphabetical order:
"Annie": Claiming to be from New York, "Annie" devotes most of her bio to gushing about "'Love & Lust in the ER' by ER doc Kevin Pezzi." She encourages people to visit Pezzi's website and download the book: "If you don't read it, I'll assume that you are lazy or don't like such stories -- bad news for you, because I'm a nurse."
If "Annie's" face seems a little... off, that's because it's been crudely photoshopped onto a stock image of a model:
"Cathi": Another Pezzi enthusiast with a face that doesn't match the rest of her head, "Cathi" lists as her favorite book: "The Science of Sex by Dr Kevin Pezzi has been my most recent read and I absolutely loved it. It changed my attitudes regarding sex and sexual pleasure..."
"Denise": Yet another buxom lass with a photoshopped face, "Denise" just loves to talk about sex: "I read several sex books and learned a few things here and there, and then I stumbled across Dr. Kevin Pezzi's 'The Science of Sex' -- and WOW! -- what a great book! I've found that it can be a useful screening test for potential boyfriends, too. If a guy wants to get to know me, I ask him to read the book first."
If you're interested in what "Denise" really looks like:
"Kelly": "Kelly's" enthusiasm for Dr. Pezzi isn't as ardent as her MySpace sisters', as she simply lists "The Science of Sex by Dr Kevin Pezzi, MD" as her favorite book, but doesn't expound on its virtues. Like the others, however, "Kelly's" profile picture doesn't quite pass the smell test.
"Lilah": Without doubt, "Lilah" is my favorite. This 30-year-old woman just moved from Boise to New York and thinks Pezzi's "The Science of Sex" is "the best book ever on the subject of... SEX!" And while "Lilah," like "Denise" and "Annie," is a busty young woman who fell victim to a poor photoshopping job, she stands apart for having the brashness to talk openly about her breasts: "And by the way... they are REAL!"
Unfortunately, the same can't be said about her face:
"Melonie": The complete package. Not only is "Melonie" well-endowed and facially challenged, but she can't talk enough about how great Dr. Kevin Pezzi is. Under the heading "Who I'd like to meet," the effusive "Melonie" has written:
Someone like Dr. Pezzi, but closer to my age. He's kind, thoughtful, highly intelligent and knowledgeable, dedicated, interesting, diversified, and does things that will boggle your mind. He designed and built a shed from scratch that looks just like a lighthouse . . . amazing! He's made countless gizmos, from motorized toboggans to medical devices that you can't even pronounce. And when he writes a book, it's not the usual "just another book on the bookshelf" type of book that is boring and soon forgotten. His books of ER stories (True Emergency Room Stories and Love & Lust in the ER) are an intense and often shocking revelation of what REALLY happens in emergency rooms. He also wrote a book about sex and claims to know more than Dr. Ruth -- and he does! Probably ten times more, I'd say. Most adults (and every man I've met) think they know everything they need to know about sex. Trust me, you don't know 1% of what he does.
And, like "Annie" and "Denise," her face has been ham-fistedly photoshopped into a stock image:
If you think these profiles are all strange coincidences, consider this: all six profiles were created within days of each other:
Annie: Signup Date: 8/31/2006
Cathi: Signup Date: 8/23/2006
Denise: Signup Date: 9/5/2006
Kelly: Signup Date: 8/31/2006
Lilah: Signup Date: 8/22/2006
Melonie: Signup Date: 8/31/2006
And don't for one second think that this creepiness is limited just to MySpace. We've also turned up two fake Twitter accounts belonging to "Lynda W" and "Jennie Simmons," who tweet almost exclusively about their love of Dr. Pezzi's books: "I wish there were others out there like myself who enjoy Dr. Kevin Pezzi's books. I must be lone reader." For some mysterious reason, they both stopped tweeting within days of each other in December 2009.
Heckuva hire, Breitbart.