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Latest Articles: Humor
A Request to LF Members
Post Date: 2015-06-22 09:38:25 by Gatlin
12 Comments
Looking for design suggestions to manufacture: I SurvivedJade Helm 15at libertysflame.com Lapel Pins and Bumper Sticker - It will be a non-profit cause.
Joyce Carol Oates, Genius
Post Date: 2015-06-09 14:45:30 by Tooconservative
0 Comments
So barbaric that this should still be allowed... No conservation laws in effect wherever this is? https://t.co/hgavm9IBaM— Joyce Carol Oates (@JoyceCarolOates) June 9, 2015 Here's the tweet she's linking: This guy thinks it's cool to kill defenceless animals then take a selfie. Jerk. pic.twitter.com/WbgMklrd9u— Chris Tilly (@TillyTweets) June 9, 2015 Poster Comment:An oldie prank, making the rounds again. There's at least one born every minute.
Hilarious Vintage Cigarette Commercials: Fred Flintstone and Barney Rubble share a couple fags
Post Date: 2015-06-02 19:00:53 by Operation 40
13 Comments
Fred and Barney at 6:34 These old cigarette commercials are hilarious. Virginia Slims: "You've got your own cigarette now baby- you've come a long long way" Any smokers here? Are you tired of paying $8, 9, 10 dollars + per Pack? A pack a day at $10/pack is $300/ month or $3,600 per year. You can roll your own cigarettes with the best ORGANIC tobacco in the world for $1.00 PER PACK or less. That's $30 per month instead of $300.- a savings of $270 per month. That really adds up after a few months. Save even more with non organic tobacco leaf. A $21.00 pound of Organic Tobacco leaves makes between 2 to 2 1/4 cartons. Say 420 cigarettes. 420 cigarettes = 2 cartons ...
I have to bake my own birthday cake
Post Date: 2015-05-26 13:26:57 by Chuck_Wagon
30 Comments
My girlfriend was aghast - She said: 'You KNOW that I can't cook a damn thing!' (True.) My Mom said: 'Look - I'll mix up the cake mix from the box - but all this stuff you are talking about - the different (2) layers and the chocolate whatever - THAT is YOUR deal.' So be it. These women are just not ambitious.... And the cherry pie filling goes on top, you see... I'll do it. I must...
Hilarious: Iowa Democrats Can’t Name a Single Granny Clinton Accomplishment
Post Date: 2015-05-20 10:48:56 by Tooconservative
10 Comments
This is just so pathetic. “She has great policies and knows how to gets stuff done” says one of these buffoons. Except he can’t name one. How do you spin this? The absurd Howard Dean gives it a shot: C’mon people, you’ve had a full year since this embarrassment to come up with something: Heck, even Grandma herself struggles to come up with something:
Political Correctness Debunked
Post Date: 2015-05-19 23:29:14 by Hondo68
0 Comments
Rand Paul remarks at CPAC Feb. 2015 blatantly re-edited and out of context.
Man Banned From Airline Over Frankly Hilarious Pinocchio Tattoo
Post Date: 2015-05-14 19:42:55 by CZ82
2 Comments
Man Banned From Airline Over Frankly Hilarious Pinocchio Tattoo Gabrielle Bluestone, 5/11/15 6:30pm Man Banned From Airline Over Frankly Hilarious Pinocchio Tattoo I cannot tell a lie—this tattoo is kind of genius and the airline that called the police and banned this man for sharing it with his fellow travelers needs to get over itself real quick!! The heyday of glamorous air travel may be over, but no one told 22-going-on-13-year-old Tom Washington, who apparently went all out for his Jet2 flight en route to vacation in Majorca, dressing up as a female flight attendant (alongside 22 of his closest friends, who did the same). And all was going well—until the Pinocchio ...
What the 72 virgins will say
Post Date: 2015-05-10 16:28:12 by Tooconservative
0 Comments
Steve Martin answered the question about what 72 virgins might really be like, and his answer follows: Virgin No. 1: Yuck. Virgin No. 2: Ick. Virgin No. 3: Ew. Virgin No. 4: Ow. Virgin No. 5: Do you like cats? I have fourteen! Virgin No. 6: I’m Becky. I’ll be legal in two years. Virgin No. 7: Here, I’ll just pull down your zipper. Oh, sorry! Virgin No. 8: Can we cuddle first? Virgin No. 9: It was a garlic-and-onion pizza. Why? Virgin No. 10: . . . so I see Heath, and he goes, “Like, what are you doing here?,” and I go, “I’m hangin’ out,” so he goes, “Like, what?” . . . Virgin No. 11: First you’re going to have to show me ...
My Linux Fortune was too good not to post...
Post Date: 2015-05-10 03:39:27 by Pinguinite
2 Comments
Q: How many members of the U.S.S. Enterprise does it take to change a light bulb?; A: Seven. Scotty has to report to Captain Kirk that the light bulb in the Engineering Section is getting dim, at which point Kirk will send Bones to pronounce the bulb dead (although he'll immediately claim that he's a doctor, not an electrician). Scotty, after checking around, realizes that they have no more new light bulbs, and complains that he "canna" see in the dark. Kirk will make an emergency stop at the next uncharted planet, Alpha Regula IV, to procure a light bulb from the natives, who, are friendly, but seem to be hiding something. Kirk, Spock, Bones, Yeoman Rand and two red shirt ...
Housing Subsidies: A Play in One Act
Post Date: 2015-04-30 07:06:16 by Tooconservative
4 Comments
Bob: I've got an idea for a new government program to help homeowners. Ray: Alright, what'd you have in mind? Bob: Hear me out. The government should send people a check every year to people who own a home--you know, to help them cover their costs a bit.Ray: I’m not saying no, but why would we do that?Bob: Home ownership is GOOD! Mom, apple pie, American flag, all that. People owning their own homes is good for America--people behave better when they own a home, right?Ray: I thought it was the other way around, that people who behave better are more likely to have the wherewithal to buy a house. Bob: Tomato, tomahto, right? We’re talking about the same thing, ...
Schick Hydro Silk TrimStyle Commercial 2015 (anyone offended by this?)
Post Date: 2015-04-22 11:13:55 by Deckard
11 Comments
I thought it was hilarious - saw it on the tee-bee.Three women stand in front of a set of small trees next to a pool. As they trim the bushes, two of the women use scissors while the third uses the Schick Hydro Silk TrimStyle razor; she gets the perfect results down to the heart shape. And, this razor has a second head perfect for more delicate areas.
Potted Meat Review
Post Date: 2015-04-22 05:36:04 by no gnu taxes
30 Comments
Potted Meat Food Product There aren't too many products that feel the need to reassure you that they are, in fact, "food." Already not a good sign. The list of ingredients is long and horrifying, coming right out of the gate with "MECHANICALLY SEPARATED CHICKEN." Oddly enough, I'm about to be separated from my lunch, and I haven't even opened the can yet. Other ingredients include BEEF TRIPE, BEEF HEARTS, AND "PARTIALLY DE-FATTED COOKED PORK FATTY TISSUE" How does one de-fat fat? Bizarre. God knows what else is in here. Okay, I'm going to go try it now. If i'm not back in ten minutes, call Poison Control... I'm back. Oofah. ...
Flash by Sheriff Rosco "The Dukes of Hazzard" soundtrack by James Best R.I.P.
Post Date: 2015-04-07 18:16:53 by Pericles
2 Comments
Last Week Tonight with John Oliver: Government Surveillance (HBO) [Patriot Act renewal, June 1]
Post Date: 2015-04-07 13:07:32 by Tooconservative
0 Comments
There are very few government checks on what America’s sweeping surveillance programs are capable of doing. John Oliver sits down with Edward Snowden to discuss the NSA, the balance between privacy and security, and dick-pics.
Poster Comment:A little racy, probably NSFW. This is civil liberties for the Daily Show millennial types.
Paul Harvey's The Rest of the Story - Lou King
Post Date: 2015-04-06 23:25:35 by Gatlin
1 Comments
Paul Harvey's The Rest of the Story - Lou King
BREAKING: Ron Paul Endorses Ted Cruz for President
Post Date: 2015-04-01 18:49:07 by Hondo68
28 Comments
Former Congressman Says Rand Paul ‘Not a True Libertarian’Early Wednesday morning, former Congressman Ron Paul (R-TX) shocked the political world by endorsing Senator Ted Cruz (R-TX) for President. The move is of marked significance, as Dr. Paul’s son Senator Rand Paul (R-KY) is expected to announce his candidacy early next week.The elder Paul quickly articulated the reasoning for his endorsement, stating that he had “read hundreds of Facebook and Reddit comments” which suggested that his son was a “neo-con establishment statist” and “not Ron Paul.” Ron Paul thereby used the articulate and well-reasoned opinions of these online libertarians to ...
Indiana Governor Stunned By How Many People Seem to Have Gay Friends
Post Date: 2015-03-30 17:27:15 by Willie Green
9 Comments
INDIANAPOLIS (The Borowitz Report)—Indiana Governor Mike Pence is “stunned and amazed” that so many people appear to have gay friends, Pence has confirmed. Speaking to reporters in his office in Indianapolis, Pence said that he made the astonishing discovery about gay friends late last week. “A lot of everyday people have gay friends, and they’re not afraid to call and/or e-mail you to tell you that,” Pence said. “To be honest, I’m still trying to process it all.” Pence said that from what he has been able to gather thus far, the phenomenon of “ordinary folks” having gay friends “has been going on for years.” “You ...
Charlie Sheen Criticizes Obama, in Ebonics, for Focusing on NCAA Bracket over Soldiers
Post Date: 2015-03-19 19:20:31 by cranky
4 Comments
Actor Charlie Sheen sent a message on Twitter Thursday afternoon mocking Barack Obama for working on his NCAA tournament bracket instead of giving attention to U.S. soldiers. The tweet, written to sound like Ebonics and intentionally morphing Obama’s name, makes reference to an unknown soldier’s funeral and links to a screen shot of the President on TV discussing his “Barack-etology” bracket for the college basketball tournament. Sheen amplified attention to his critique with his permutation of Obama’s name, “Barry Soetero Kenya.” Most of the press has taken this flourish as a nod to the Birther movement–those who believe Obama was not born in ...
Happy Monday! A Cop Car Caught Fire Outside of Dunkin’ Donuts.
Post Date: 2015-03-17 11:15:13 by Deckard
7 Comments
(ANTIMEDIA) Portsmouth, VA — While police in Portsmouth were stopped early Friday morning at a Dunkin’ Donuts, a miracle happened. The heavens smiled upon America’s indentured slaves and the cop car caught fire, seriously. The car was parked at the Dunkin’ Donuts @ 4701 George Washington Highway in Portsmouth, VA. Firefighters fucked it up around 2am and put the fire out. Clueless, the police are investigating what caused the fire. No one was hurt by the blaze except the police car; a car traditionally used to help cops issue tickets and imprison folks into Virginia’s for-profit prison system. Mysteriously, Dunkin Donuts ...
Americans Favor Legalizing Pot and Criminalizing Congress
Post Date: 2015-03-02 09:01:06 by Deckard
1 Comments
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—By a huge majority, Americans support laws legalizing marijuana and criminalizing Congress, according to a poll released on Thursday.While the poll reflects a relaxation of attitudes about recreational pot use, it also suggests that many Americans now view membership in Congress as a problem ravaging the nation.>"" st*l*="border: 0px none; vertical-align: bottom;" marginheight="0" marginwidth="0" scrolling="no" name="google_ads_iframe_/3379/newyorker.dart/humor/borowitz_report_2" id="google_ads_iframe_/3379/newyorker.dart/humor/borowitz_report_2" frameborder="0" ...
ISIS
Post Date: 2015-03-01 12:30:25 by Pridie.Nones
1 Comments
Finally! Chemtrails Debunked (Epic FAIL!)
Post Date: 2015-02-23 13:13:28 by Deckard
3 Comments
Darn it! Those pesky concerned citizens are at it again, always looking up in the sky and calling in worried that the government is poisoning us… Thank goodness Steve the weatherman is here to explain everything. Well I guess that clears that up, right guys?Comments from YouTube :anavash2 days ago (edited) I hope this guy gets hit by a bus with Jesus driving. Yah that's just totally normal. I mean I live in AZ and when i first moved here the sun shined constantly. But now I walk outside in the morning and the sky is totally covered over with shit and god knows what from planes crossing the skies in a grid pattern. Totally normal! That's always happened! And they always ...
Hitler Finds Out About Brian Williams
Post Date: 2015-02-15 20:33:36 by Golem
2 Comments
Planning for next year's election, Hitler finds out Brian Williams has imploded.
Friday Funnies: This is Brian Williams Reporting
Post Date: 2015-02-06 13:52:19 by Deckard
9 Comments
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