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Title: Glenn Beck Moves to Sci Fi Channel
Source: [None]
URL Source: http://www.borowitzreport.com/2011/ ... -beck-moves-to-sci-fi-channel/
Published: Apr 7, 2011
Author: borowitzreport.com
Post Date: 2011-04-07 12:51:27 by no gnu taxes
Keywords: None
Views: 14003
Comments: 16

Landing on his feet just hours after his program was dropped by Fox News Channel, controversial host Glenn Beck announced today that he had just inked a new contract to join the cable network Syfy, formerly known as the Sci Fi Channel.

Speaking at a press conference announcing the move, Mr. Beck told reporters, “The best part of this deal is that I won’t need to change my format at all.”

Mr. Beck said that his program was “a perfect fit” for a schedule of programming packed with aliens, paranoid conspiracy theories and alternative universes.

But the TV host’s enthusiasm was tempered somewhat by Syfy spokesperson Tracy Klugian, who told reporters, “We warned Glenn that if he’s going to be a good fit for Syfy he’s going to have to tone down his act a bit. Some of the stuff he did on Fox is a little too ‘out there’ for us.”

Mr. Beck said that his new deal would run “until 2012 or the end of the world, whichever comes sooner,” and that he would be paid in gold bullion and ammo.

Meanwhile, Congress reassured the American people that during a government shutdown essential services would still be provided to Libya, Afghanistan and Iraq. (1 image)

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Begin Trace Mode for Comment # 15.

#1. To: no gnu taxes (#0)

I love Glen Beck. He will rock any station he is on. :)

diva betsy ross  posted on  2011-04-07   14:21:13 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#2. To: diva betsy ross (#1)

I love Glen Beck.

Ms. diva betsy ross, Glenn Beck has deceived you. Perhaps you haven't heard of his infamous fake tears broadcasts and crowing about the outcome to draw an audience towards his magnetic personality.

Clyven  posted on  2011-04-07   17:26:41 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#3. To: Clyven (#2)

No, he does have a magnetic personality, and he is attractive too. I don't watch much TV, but Glen is entertaining. I would enjoy having a drink with him and chatting. :)

I don't agree with him always- and he doesn't shape my politics, but he does entertain me.

I like him.

diva betsy ross  posted on  2011-04-07   17:32:35 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#4. To: diva betsy ross (#3)

He is a professional entertainer is all. He is akin to Rush Limbaugh and there are many, many liberal talkshow hosts that counter balance those two dead weights such as Bill Maher and Dave Matthews.

Please remember that while America has been fascinated with the entertainment of popular talkshow hosts for over a decade, America has lost control on just about everything in life that was once held dear to the moral, ethical and constitutional value systems that were once the anchor of what made America great.

I would enjoy having a drink with him and chatting.

Please do. That alcoholic needs a refresher.

Clyven  posted on  2011-04-07   17:50:32 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#15. To: Clyven (#4)

:blush: That was not a good choice of words from me. But I will stand being entertained by him.

I don't listen to the others, or watch TV-So I don't feel badly about enjoying Glenn every once in a while.

diva betsy ross  posted on  2011-04-07   21:38:42 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


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